lets bring the past back....

whattaday!!! just had 4 hours of sleep,know why? i had to meet up with a special someone.... tsk,tsk,tsk....
anyway, i have met this special someone last september of 2001 (believe!). we were chatters in a chatroom before (broken hearted chatroom) and we got to meet on a birthday party of a chatter as well... after that day, we had been constant textmates, and gradually he admitted that he liked me... and who am i to refuse this guy? he's smart, good-looking and oozing with talent. a no ordinary guy i should say...i felt good during those times, cuz i have also learned to like him. he left a smile in my face whenever the day ends. and i should say that he has a spot in my heart.
however,let me tell you one thing that made things complicated... he has a girlfriend;3 years at that time.so at that point, we cannot do anything since he loves his girlfriend more... i never tried to change his mind...and i never asked him to leave her or whatever. i just took everything as it is. to make it simple, he has his girlfriend and i was just the special friend, i guess.

time has passed and look its already 2006! how are we doing? well, we still get a chance to be together once in a while. there was even a time when i was in a relationship, we still go out and had a time on our own, but of course nothing fancy... But then he had another girlfriend (who happen to be a friend of mine)i tried to stay out of the picture... of course, i felt envious and jealous... i never had the chance to go out with him at that time cuz i think he was damn busy with his new found relationship. i was envious, why we didnt end up together instead? why he had to look for another one when i am just here?! i was sad... very very sad.... but again i didnt do anything and i didnt try to change him. their relationship didnt last long... so again... i got "in" to his life again or should i say he noticed me after a while... honestly,i was glad that the relationship had ended, though i know in his heart that he truly loves the gurl. but fate had its own ship to sail....

now, i dunno if i should be asking the same question again.... now that he is single and I am single, why cant we just continue what we had before? we still get to see each other, so that means WE still like each other right? so whats missing? i like this guy very much, and given the chance i would like to have him OFFICIALLY in my life,but i dont want to confront him neither ask him whats the status nor his feelings for me cuz im afraid i'd get the worst reply. i dont know what to do.....

Kiss- Because Im a Girl

i have already seen this video a million times but it still has that tearjerking impact on me.... i really LOOOOOOve this!!

Today

had a hell of drinking last night with my colleagues, and surprisingly it turned to be a reunion since there were new faces who also work in the company...what makes it more interesting is that my crush arrived.. the Operations Manager! geek, too bad he didnt notice me though i was singing when they arrived. hmph!!

my friends were geek as hell!!! they were tearing my skirt off yesterday!!! almost embarrassed me...

though i should say i did one embarrassing thing... i was dared to kiss this cute guy!! AND I DID!!!! and it was not just a kiss, it was french!! tooo bad i cant remember how it felt ahihihi!!!


gosh!! i think that would be the last time i would be drinking, i got real bad headache this morning...