Goodbye CVG!

Yup! You've read it right!!! After one year and 10 months, I am leaving Convergys Alabang. Its not a big decision to make since the place where I'm transferring at is not far from home (actually its just adjacent to the CVG building, aheheh), plus I have friends who have also moved to this new company.

I dont want to go into the details of why I'm leaving... and reasons why I am suddenly moved to give it a shot. However, I hope this would not imply that I am not grateful with the company.

By the way, I will still see you guys! I will just peek through the window.. ahehehe!!!

Christmas Sentiments...

Another Christmas had passed... This time, I was at work when all the rest of the people here in the country were having Noche Buena with their families. Too bad! When the clock striked 12, all that we had to do was greet each other at the office and send hugs and kisses at our so called chatroom. We didn't have to time to hug and kiss each other for real cuz we were having high call volume during that day, for a reason I don't understand... Had the Americans forgot that it was Christmas Eve?

Anyway, this year was quite different since I have a special someone to celebrate the holidays with. Though we were not literally together, I know that he is in my heart and same with him. The relationship may be a bit complicated as to compare with the others but I'm still happy with the way things are running.

I miss my partying though, aheheheh!! Last year, I had to block my schedule for a week since a have lotsa parties to attend to... Hmmm... what happened to me this year? The irony of it was, I was able to attend our office's christmas party when last year I didn't. I think times changing and priorities as well. But I miss my buddies, drinking buddies... ahehehe!!! The PEX people, my classmates in Highschool, my former officemates... urgh!

One good thing that happened this Christmas was, our family had the chance to be with my niece, Aleeia. She is with her dad ever since he and sis broke up. The kid stayed with us for 3 days which is not bad, ahehehe!!! I'm talking about 3 kids at home!! Imagine that!!!

For the past years, our close relative (from San Pedro, Laguna as well) would pay us a visit and celebrate with us. They didn't fail us this year and yes we had a great time! We were just hoping we would be complete :(. Since my sister is away, and my cousin is also in Qatar and is set to go home in March. Hopefully, next year will be better. But of course I could still say we enjoyed our time together, with the rest of the kids...

I'm looking forward to New Year's celebration, since I will be home and will be waiting for the clock to strike 12 and jump!!!! Hopefully to gain more in height ahahahha!!!

To everyone, hope you had everything that you want from your Christmas Wishlist!!!

rant... rant... rant....

I've always thought that when i'm into a relationship,it would fulfill all the emptiness in me... that it will make me feel complete... that everything would really be colorful... but then sometimes i could be wrong...

i am thankful for the good times i have with my special someone. i am also grateful for the love i've felt from him. never have i imagined that loving could be this sweet and wonderful. there are a lot realizations that this relationship has given me and these sometimes make me wonder if im really ready to keep this commitment.

its hard to love someone who has a different outlook in life. its hard to keep up to his expectations. its more difficult to live with someone who cannot assure you of what your future with him would be.

tell me one thing, is this how love should work? is this how every woman should endure? is this how every relationship endures?

im trying to figure out if it would be all worth it to let go rather than holding on to something that can't assure me of anything... aside from love (?) is this all that's gonna matter? what about the future of your family? what about the everyday dealings?

i've been torn and i guess will always be torn...

November 2007

One family reunion that we would always reminisce, since we have my big sis around this time. It is not often that we would have her on occasions like this. We spent the entire day at the cemetery and we got sunburns all over!!! argh!!

the original kaladkarin

the original kaladkarin
Originally uploaded by hybridrey15

from L-R, joy, ej, danie and me. we are always on the go! regardless if we had enough sleep or none we always wanted to go out...hehehe!!! we're missing alyne here though.... we miss you girl!

would you believe she's a bi??!!!

would you believe she's a bi??!!!
Originally uploaded by hybridrey15

one of my constant companions at work.. a friend i thought never really cared for me, but she does!

What's In My Name?

The name of Andrea gives you a clever, quick, analytical mind, but you suffer with a great deal of self-consciousness, lack of confidence, and much aloneness because of misunderstandings. Your idealistic and sensitive nature gives you a deep appreciation for the finer things of life and a strong desire to be of service to humanity. There are times when you experience inner turbulence at your inability to say what you mean. It is far easier for you to express your deeper thoughts and feelings through writing than verbally. You find pleasure in literature, in poetry, and in your ideals and will turn to them when you feel you have been misunderstood. You are deeply moved by the beauties of life, especially nature. Because your feelings run deep, you must guard against the ups and downs, being very inspired one minute, then moody, reserved, and depressed the next. Your reactions to people vary according to how you feel. You tend to be secretive and noncommittal about private matters, yet at times you will talk effusively in order to hide your self-consciousness or to lead others away from personal subjects. You are inspired by encouragement from others, yet suspicious of their intent. You crave affection but seldom find anyone who understands your nature. Physical weaknesses would show in your heart, lungs, or bronchial organs


what yours mean

Goodbye 91m19

Last Aug 25, I had to say goodbye to these people I had shared my daily routines at work. It was my last day in this team. And ironically, we had to celebrate! Hehehehe!!! This is just for the good times that we've had. I hope what I have contributed in the team would always be remembered...

Guys, just because Im no longer in the team doesnt mean I would no longer care. Im with you all through out... will miss you guys :)

My blog is worth......

My blog is worth $564.54.
How much is your blog worth?

gosh!! my blog is just worth this much?!!!

I guess my blog is really worthless after all... :(

i want...

I want the warm early morning kiss
to start my day right.


I want to feel your embrace
and feel security with those broad arms.

I want to spend the entire night with you
and just hide under your face.

I want to cuddle in bed with you
where nothing matters but you and me and our love.


I want those sweet little suprises
that would enlighten my ebbing mood.


I want to receive bouquet of white roses
that would reveal the sincerity of your love.

I want the long walk along the shore
hand in hand, where we are one with the world.


I want to wear your wedding ring
to let the entire world know how proud
I am to be committed to you.

27th Birthday

I havent had a good birthday celebration for the last 9 years... Maybe because I'm no longer into having one. This year I ended up having lunch with 2 of my closest friends and just bought a new pair of shoes as a gift for my self.

Yeah, I didnt receive any gift, neither from my closest friends nor from my family. Its just an up and go I guess. My family has been through a lot recently that I understood why they have forgotten my birthday (literally, yeah...). Well that is also the reason why I didnt intend to celebrate... There were a lot of things we had to focus on rather than having a party.

Im getting scared... thats what I feel right now. Scared of what life would bring me, my family. Whats more in this life that I have to endure? Would I really be growing old alone with my kid? Am I really bound to be a single parent my entire life? Am I not goin to have someone to share the ups and downs of having a family?

Could it be I'm not really ready to have a family of my own, thats why its not given to me yet? Could it be that it would be more difficult for me to live with someone? Or am I really bound to eternal singleness?

I know I still have to wait... forgive me for ranting...

rant rant rant....

already up at 2:30 am. cannot sleep anymore. had filed for VL for 2 days but i just ended up staying at home rather than goin out with friends, though i miss goin out with them... the fact is... the last time i went out with my circle of friends was last March 1. the rest of my days were with my colleagues.

anyway, will be celebrating my 27th birthday soon and im getting scared...

for one, in just a few years, i would already be reaching the age that most women fear... am i just over reacting or something??? i dont know.

i just hope this year would be more wonderful and meaningful...

i wont be making my wishlist yet, still early.. hehehehe!!

Letting You Go

i have been praying
that you wont leave me hanging around
that it would be your voice that will wake me up each morning
that we'll walk together,hand in hand

it has been so long
since i uttered those prayers
and it has troubled both my mind and my heart
but no answer was found
no answer was sent from above

i have watched a thousand sunsets
i have read a dozen novels
i have searched and searched for an answer
none, nothing
not even a hint was there

you know i need you and i love you
but i must go out in this world
and break this fantasy
so i am walking away
running,crying away from you

tonight my beloved
i am praying
in the same room that i have prayed before
i'll force my self to sleep and drift some sorrow
for tomorrow i am letting you go...


will be missing you......

Im depressed....

I have a depression I do have to admit,
Admit that I have been depressed.
Thinking how much I wish I could be
happy,
Thinking how much I want in life,
Thinking how much you can miss someone
you love.

When I look back I can see how much
this depression has been there in my
life.
I need this to be fake.
I need this not to be true.
Yet again its true I have this
depression that makes me sad inside and
the outside.

My depression has caused me to see how
sad I can be.
How it makes me feel,
How this depression makes me think of
cutting and suicide.
But we are all human.
We have all have something to overcome.
I will overcome this depression once
and for all.
I will fight back somehow.
This depression I will get rid of
someday...
For now I have to deal with it.

Mother's Day '07

Just had a little dinner at one of the restos in Alabang. This was just one of those memorable dine outs I had with my family since we dont get together that often. My sister was at home this time after being away for more than 2 years.

I love my mom, I may not be able to tell it to her personally or even let her feel it but I do. She is the only one who had struggled for us to survive. My dad had to leave us when I was 8 yrs old and my sis was 9. Imagine the hardship. She had to work most of the time and we had to understand why she cant attend to us. It is true indeed that mothers would endure a lot of sacrifices and pain just to give what would make her family happy and contented.

Now that I am a mom myself, a single mom that is, I also would like to do the best I can to provide whatever my kid needs. It may not be enough but I surely let my son understand the why's and how's of life. My son may not have the grasp of it right now but I know at the right time he would. He has to.

Im still keeping my fingers crossed that someday I would be able to complete the missing piece of my family. I hope he is there....

What a Relief!!!

The show cause that was given to me last month, ended up with just a written warning!!! whew!!! It was really a relief!!!

I was supposed to be suspended for 10 days. I have even asked my supervisor to give me straight 10 days for the suspension since I would like to take it as a break and a way to deliberate on things. I was prepared for it already... I have made plans actually, heheheh!!! Hey, who doesnt want to have a vacation??? :)

Well, Im still thankful God had helped me get thru with it.

grrrrr....

Just received a "show-cause" today, right after shift. It was for call avoidance. When I read through the content of the letter, no specific detail would imply that I did commit any of the offenses for this. It was only about dealing with the customer for 17 minutes and putting the customer in improper hold, which doesnt necessarily mean that I tried to avoid the call or something.

I was stunned.

I dont really know if this is part of politics or something. But I know something is not right. My previous supervisor had to deal with the letter. He understands the gravity of the offense being subject to me when in fact there isnt any issue at all. I mean, there is but he doesnt see where I had really committed the offense. He offered to take charge of the reply. And yes, he mentioned every detail why I shouldnt be sanctioned.

Its not the end of it though. I have to wait til monday. My present TL and I would need to discuss this. I know Im not to be sanctioned for termination, but I know there is someone with greater power who has a say to this issue and that is what im afraid of.

I can leave the company, why not? What is hurtin me is thought that I would be leaving the people I have lived with. These are great people and I love them.
Its not easy. It wont be easy.

But still, im keeping my fingers crossed. Hoping that I may be able to get through with this.

Is there a real love waiting for me?

I know that im not the only one who experiences this type of melancholy... and whenever it strikes there's nothing i can due but to endure the pain and the sudden sadness that fills my heart.

My thoughts are being bugged by relevant things in MY world. I surely get by. Im ok. Im happy. But bein happy doesnt necessarily mean that you are content, right?

It may not be appropriate for me to ask more than what i have now. But it would be hypocrite of me to let go of this wantness to be with him.

I have loved a few and let go of some... this I know... however i have to look for the missing piece of my jigsaw puzzle. How and where, I dont know yet...

Keep on waiting... waiting... and waiting... but what if there's really nothing and no one to wait for?

Summer Shindig '07

from L to R : Anj, Ja, Danie, moi and Ej




after the "Amazing Convergys Race"



... and the winner is.... us!!!


... and the winner is.....




mah team...

It was our company's summer outing. held at Spash Oasis Resort on April 8, 2007.

My first DSAT for this year

After bearing the tag "CSAT Champion of the Team" for some months now, I just received the bad news last Friday about the DSAT (dissatisfied) I surprisingly got from a call not long ago.

I could still remember the call... It was from a racist customer who would want me to connect his call to an agent from the US. But of course, I enthusiastically replied that I could assist him with his concern. He even commented, "lets give it a try!!", with a sarcastic tone.

It was just a simple reinstatement of his services, nothing more nothing less. He never asked for any other details on his account neither any promotions on goin. I did my job and we ended the call. AS simple as that...

It is a big pain for me and my career. All the while my boss is encouraging me to apply for better positions at the office, which I guess, I should have prioritized at that time. With this at hand, it would take a few months for me to be able to grab the title again and work on my achievements....

CSRL '97... 10 years onwards...

Yup, 10 years has passed already and yet we still have the same longing for this friendship. We might have our own priotities now and own lives to manage. But still we try to catch up and make this thing last our lifetime. Its funny though that here we are, busy with our own shit but these guys have not forgotten to go back where they really belong. We had matured though... some of us dont really cry over a piece of cake that someone takes from us... but we do if its our guy who's being taken from us...At least we've grown up a bit... hehehe!!!

These are just some of the shots we had. April 6-8, 2007 Bato Springs, San Pablo, Laguna.

CSRL>

in the corner of my mind i know he is still with me, beside me, whispering words warm enough to melt my heart. his face flashing right before my very eyes. my heart pounding at the very sound of his name.

my thoughts are just all about him. my plans include him, asking God to make him mine. groping at every chance there is to see him and feel him. breathing just for him and his existence.

with the messages he sends me, my heart is filled with joy, keeps me on my feet. trying to digest every word, comprehending the thought beneath those words. wondering if he knows how he means to me.

and every time i go to sleep, his thoughts and sweet promises keep on echoing at the back of my mind. bringing smile in to my face after i say my evening prayer. wishing that by the time i wake up its you i would see.

still i wish there's something i could do to change how things are right now. hoping we are both free to love and we both feel something special for each other. but damn... im just a friend...and i guess im the only one who misses him... :(

Chasing Butterflies

Have you ever tried chasing after butterflies? It's tough...if not virtually impossible.Won't do anyone good to chase after something so elusive much less have a relationship with one. That reality has been constantly being rammed into my thick skull for the longest time. But alas there is something so very mesmerizing about butterflies so very intriguing yet so deadly.It may be a magical experience but only for a limited time because butterflies tend to fly away without hesitation to their next destination. Hanging on to them is futile because you are just a stop over after all. The hurtful part of the experience is that you get left behind without a warning. One day you're up in the clouds the next day you're down on the ground and you never knew it coming.I heard someone say that when you're heart takes a big blow and it gets torn into a million pieces, your heart grows back bigger than it was the first time. Maybe that's why I could feel no anger just a quiet acceptance and deeper understanding. Sure the tears are there but my feet is still firmly on the ground this time and i have a stronger resolve not to chase after butterflies...i keep my palm open this time. So go on and fly...you're free to fly...my butterfly.I firmly believe that I am worth coming home to and build a home with...since you choose to fly away...then i guess you're not the one for me. Somewhere, someone, sometime i'll be found and i'll find the one for me. And that would be the happiest day of my life...no more chasing after butterflies.