It is INDEED your Turn

Finally, it is your turn to have an entry in my blog KUMANDER!!! You deserve it since you will be (sadly) be having your own team.

You got it right! She just got promoted! Our TSL Kumander will no longer be our TSL.

This is REALLY a good news for her and her family. After being promoted last year to a TSL, this year she is promoted again!!! That should prove something right?

I will miss her. Truly... I will miss her stories regarding her colorful lovelife. I will miss our heart to heart talk during coaching our sessions. I will also miss her, sometimes provoking approach. And most of all, I will miss our friendship.

I will always think of the day that I cried to you... When I was having a bad day and a bad case of heartache. You got me enlightened and renewed.

I just hope that you will take with you the culture that we have in the team. That you will continue to grow in your field. That you will improve with your leadership skills and that you will never forget what your TL has honed you to be.

Thanks for everything girl. I know you deserve this promotion. I will still see you.


Congratulations!!!



Me and My Kumander

Check her blog : Kumander's Site

Pahabol:
Bkit kumader? Kase under ako sa kanya... ahehehe!!!

Farewell Ronald a.k.a Radiskull

Maaring hindi mo kilala si Ronald. Kung hindi ka nagagawi sa PEX, hindi mo rin alam kung gano kakulit si Radiskull mag post sa forum. At sa tingin ko, di mo rin mararamdaman kung gaano namin ikinabigla ang bigla nyang paglisan.

May 2 taon ko na rin nakila si Ronald (Yoy). Mahilig kase kame sa dinner na may inuman (kaya nabuo ang DSIG - Dinner Sabay Inom Gang). Active pa ako sa ganun dati dahil sa Makati pa ako nagwowork. Nun nalipat ako sa Alabang, di na ako masyado nakakasama pero I make it a point na kung may oras din lang ako, pupunta at pupunta ako.

Isa sya sa mga makukulit na tao na nakasama ko. No dull moments ika nga. Masayahing tao at di mo aakalain na meron palang dinaramdam. Itinago nya sa ibang mga kaibigan ang tunay na nagaganap sa mundo nya dahil na rin siguro ayaw nyang magalala kame sa kanya. Ayaw din nya siguro ng special attention. Marahil ayaw din nya isipin na sa gitna ng pagpapatawa nya ay nagaalala kame sa kalagayan nya.

Natanggap ko ang balita kay Saint Destroyer (Ceasar). Isang kaibigan din sa PEX. Hindi pa ako makapaniwala. Kaya tinext ko pa si Ay Ako Ba (Helen) na kasalukuyang nasa flight pauwi dito sa Manila. Ikinibit balikat ko muna since wala pang confirmation. Hapon na ng magreply si Ay Ako Ba. Wala pala siyang alam sa naganap. Kinailangan nyang tawagan un doktor na tumitingin kay Yoy. At dito namin nakumpirma...

Humahagulgol na tumawag ulit si Helen sa akin. At dahil nasa van na ako papunta sa trabaho, di ko magawang sabayan siya sa pag iyak nya. Pero may kumirot. Gusto ko ring umiyak.

Hindi ko akalain na un birthday ni Helen last year ang huling pagkakataon na makakasama ko sya. Di ko man lang sya nadamayan nun mga panahong kailangan nya ng magpapalakas ng loob nya at magbibigay sa kanya ng lakas ng loob. Di ko man lang nasabi sa kanya na naappreciate ko mga hirit nya at mga kalokohan nya kapag magkakasama kame. Higit sa lahat, hindi ko napatunayan sa kanya na isa ako sa mga tunay na kaibigan nya.

Sa ngayon, ang naiwan nya samin ay ang mga masasayang alaala. Ang tanging magagawa na lang namin sa ngayon ay ang ipagdasal na maging mas masaya sya kung san man sya naroroon. Naway mapaligaya din nya ang bawat taong makakausap niya dun tulad ng ginawa nya samin. At sana malaman nya na talagang mamimiss namin sya.

Goodbye Yoy!!! We will always miss you!!!


Happy Yoy pics...

On Chris Brown and Rihanna

I'm not really a fan of the couple. Honestly, I wasn't even aware that they were until the incident(that's one of the perks of working in a call center). But why post something about it? Because if the accusations are true, Rihanna and I will have something in common...

Year 2000. My ex and I have already parted ways. There was no commitment. But we still see each other often since we went to the same school in college. Aside from that, my kid was with him. I just visit their pad everyday to take care of our kid. Most often, I would stay there and sleep there for days. During that time, we still do what we used to do as a couple(if you know what I mean). At school, we would still go together on our classes and during breaks. Just for companionship, I guess. Although I would admit that during that time, I was still hoping that we would still be able to patch things up. I have greatly loved this guy. Of course, I have a kid with him. I thought the baby would actually be the reason for us to stay together; that the kid will be binding us together, but I was wrong.

It occured after class. I went straight to his place to do the usual mother thing. He then arrived with his girlfriend (mind you, he was already married at this point. Womanizer!) This gave me a little pinch. How could he bring this girl here? Where his son could see? Where's his respect for me and our kid? But knowing the type of "relationship" we were into, I had to keep my thoughts and control my temper. I couldnt show how jealous I was. I had to pretend that it was ok. What I had in mind then was, he was fooling his wife, not me. But it still effin' hurts.

I went outside to check them out. I was able to greet them with a smile. After a few exchange of hypocrisy, my ex had to get inside. Me and the girl were left in that awkward and unusual situation. While trying to scrutinize the type of girl that she was, I noticed that she was wearing a ring that looks the same as mine. What the F?!!! I had to ask the girl where that ring came from and she replied that it was given by my EX. I thought I lost mine a few weeks back and seeing it with her triggered something else. This called for a fight.

I forgot what respect meant at that moment. I felt my heart plummeted. My blood rushing in my head, boiling at 100 degrees. I even felt my mind saying to grab her hand and take off the ring. I wanted to scream for the multiple events of disrepect in just one day. How could he?!!!

When he got back, I immediately asked him where my ring was. In front of his girlfriend I confronted him. With fury eyes and a heart ready to palpitate anytime. After series of interrogations about the ring, he led me inside the house. And there it happened.

The first blow of his fist was in the bathroom. Why in the bathroom? Since I got scared with his threats I tried to walk away from him. But as I step back he would take a step ahead. The bathroom was the dead end. I knew at that point that he was serious about hurting me. And he did. The first punch was supposed to be in my face, but I had to avoid it so his fist landed at the back of my ear. There was a big contusion.

Next thing I know, I was in our room packing my stuff and my kid's. While packing, we still said mean things to each other. I for one was very furious and I felt a dymamite just blew. He then hit me in my stomach. Not only once... I curled in bed like a fetus because of the pain. One landed in my arm. It left a big purple-reddish mark. This was when I cried. The anger and the pain was so much for me to take. Never have I imagined that stories about battered wives or partners would actually happen to me... At the early age of 19.


I continued packing our things. I was so determined to leave that hell with my kid and never to go back. I swore that I would no longer be seeing him and that I would be keeping my kid away from him. I thought my sobs would soften his heart but unfortunately it didnt. It didnt stop there.

He dragged me out of his house. A guy who's 5'9 in height dragged me like a little kid. Careless that my dress would be torn. Not contented with the outbursts earlier. I felt so belittled and abused. After all the love and understanding that I have given him, this was all I would get. Not only emotional pain but also physical.

It was a nightmare. One of those that I never thought would be happen to me. I was able to recover from it but God knows how long I have waited patiently to get over it. I'm still thankful I didnt end up with my ex. If that was the case, this incident would not be the first and last.

I wonder if I could be an advocate for NGOs for women against physical abuse...

Blue on a Red Day

It's Valentine's once again...

For the last 28 years in my life I havent really had a Valentine's Date. I'm talking about dinner by candle light, quiet time in a peaceful mountain gazing at the stars, or just merely surprise visits by a partner with flowers and chocolates.

Its not fancy talking. Some women are really into mushy stuff like me. We dream of having that moment where we would feel that our hearts would be melted by the effort by our partners to make this day extra special. "Kilig Moments" kumbaga.

My heart is still yearning for the love of someone who would unselfishly give my heart's desires. Who would pave the way to make my dream wedding a reality. Who would help me build dreams of having a family with me. Who would accept me wholeheartedly for the woman that I am. Who would relentlessly exert the effort to make me happy. Who would stick with me through think and thin, thru pain and laughter. Who would stay by me til the day I die.

I thought I found him already. I thought I was happy. I thought I was complete. I thought I would never ask more than his love.

But there's more in our relationship... And it had to end....

It has already ended.

Sad truth is reality bites. Not only bites but it swallows you whole. Once you've given something, it would still ask for more, more than what you can take. Take that part of you that you keep for your self til you have no more.

It has taken that dream of being with someone. I got tired. Tired of understanding. My patience got exhausted and drained. It was bitter to say that he never tried to win me back and patch things up. Painful is an understatement.

Nothing could take that lost love and trust which I have worked hard for our relationship. Nothing could glue this broken pieces of my heart. Its unmendable. Its torn. Completely...

I'm still hurting... All I can do is just pray that may God take away the pain and just stop my heart for falling for someone. I dont think I can take another blow. I might not take it anymore...

There goes my Valentine's thoughts....

My Wacky Kid goes Weak

My 9 year old kid has been having LBM since Friday. Though the frequency had already lessened as of yesterday. Nakakahiya man sabihin pero di ko kase masyado sineryoso nun pagkauwi ko ng Friday morning, akala ko kase titigil din un LBM nya after he took some medicines. In short, after a few hours upon arriving, tinulugan ko na sya. Kampante na kase ako na since nakainom na sya ng gamot titigil na sya.

Then I woke up with a loud sound!Followed by a scream! Napatayo ako ng walang kapungas pungas at tumambad sa aking paningin ang anak ko na nakahiga sa sahig.Dahil di ko alam ang nangyari, agad ko syang tinayo at isinandal sa upuan. Wala pala syang malay. Dun ko na lang narealize na nagpass out pala sya. After a few seconds, dumilat na sya at sinabi nya sakin na umiikot paningin nya at wla sya marinig. Natakot ako, wala pa ako kase naexperience na ganito. Pero pinilit kong kumalma kahit naiiyak na ako. Mababaw din kase ang luha ko. Nagtapang-tapangan na lang ako at inisip ko agad kung ano ang dapat gawin. Binalik ko sya sa pagkakahiga para makapagpahinga ng tuluyan.

Bigla ako napaisip, napabayaan ko na pala sya. Siguro sa dami na ng nailabas nyang dumi hindi na nakayanan ng katawan nya. Di ko masisi un kasama ko sa bahay dahil busy din sya sa gawain bahay. Kaya bigla ako naguilty...

"Ayaw ko mamatay", sabi nya sakin. Syempre, inassure ko sya na di sya mamamatay. Nag "i love you" sya sakin, sabay yakap... di ko napigilan... napaiyak ako. Di na ako nakasagot, kadalasan kase sasabihan ko rin sya ng " i love u", pero dahil umiiyak na ako mas pinili ko na lang na yumakap sa knya para hindi nya makita na umiiyak ako. Ayokong makita nya, dahil alam ko ako ang magbibigay sa kanya ng lakas ng loob sa sitwasyon na un. Pero kung alam lang nya, na kung natatakot sya mas natatakot ako.

It was a very touching moment... Narealize ko kung gano ako kamahal ng anak ko. Naghahanap ako ng pagmamahal sa ibang tao, halos manlimos ako ng pagmamahal. Un pala sa anak ko na lang makukuha un pagmamahal na hinahanap ko...



At Enchanted Kingdom, Feb 2008